The husband and I started this journey 8 months ago. I can tell you, it’s not easy. The deployment. We all know what the soldiers go through is difficult. They are the ones away from home. My husband said to me recently ” I can’t sleep when I want to, I can’t wear what I want to, I live by what they tell me to do, it’s so hot here and I’m hungry all the time. I’m sorry for complaining I just miss home and I miss you” -insert heart breaking- am I right?
I have to do a husband brag: He was fantastic about contacting me. He promised me before he left he would contact me as much as possible and he did. It helped ease my worries but allowed me to trust him and feel less like my world is crashing down around me.
So I’ve compiled a random list of the lessons I’ve learned so far with this deployment. Random being the keyword here.
Lesson 1: So for anyone deployed or soon to be deployed, if you are able to, contact your significant other in some way. I know things come up. You get busy, there isn’t internet service, you are in the middle of no where, traveling, or you aren’t allowed to contact home for security purposes. That’s a whole different ballgame.
Lesson 2: Speaking of, there will be times when you do not hear from your significant other. No news is good news. Make friends with other spouses. They know what you’re going through and are sympathetic to all freak outs that will happen. Also find someone who has been through a deployment before.
Lesson 3: Non-military friends are great too. They remind you that there are movies to be seen, restaurants to go to, and malls to go shopping.
Lesson 4: Skype is wonderful but also the worst thing ever. Connection is poor, calls dropped, and you frequently ask can you hear me? And when you get those wonderful Skype calls where you can see your husband, you want to praise the Internet for working.
Lesson 5: You will spend a lot of time with your electronic device. That alone is annoying and stressful. You wake up in a panic looking for your phone… uhm hello 8 months later and I still wake up with anxiety over my phone’s location in the bed. I promise you, the minute you walk away from your phone that one time they will contact you. Just accept that now.
Side note: Have a rule for calls if you want to… For example this was ours: “If I don’t pick up the first time try one more time if you can”
Layla knows how to get my attention if I’m on the computer too long. She waits with me some days too
Lesson 6: Make yourself happy. For some reason this occurred to me the hardest way ever. Like HELLO. I’m an introvert. It makes me happy. I love being alone. I get recharged, energized, and feel overall happier. People exhaust me. I forced myself to come out of my shell and be a social butterfly. It lead me to become overwhelmed and frustrated. However if you thrive off of being around people, please continue to do so. It was not for me.
Lesson 7: Murphy’s law: “Anything that can go wrong. Will”… It will break. Shit will hit the fan. And you will hate the world for a moment. But remember it’s a brief moment. It will not last.
Lesson 8: Get a watch that reads two time zones. I have a Digital Timex Ironman Triathlon watch. I push a button and it tells me my husbands time zone. No body got time to be calculating a time zone difference.
Lesson 9: Find a hobby. I decided that care packages were my new hobby. I loved it. USPS gives you free APO boxes. They deliver them to your door.
This was my husbands favorite box.
Lesson 10: You can do it. One day at a time.
I will continue to post lessons on the deployment, as well as some care packages that I sent to my husband this year. If you ever feel alone or want advice on what a deployment is like feel free to send me an
email pumpedforpumpkin at gmail dot com
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